Inside their Minds

During my days in secondary school, I read alot of western books, they appealed to me more. Especially the ones that helped create a fantasy of what love should be like.

Something fae fetched from reality. I would borrow a novel today and by the end of today, I would be done with the book, as another person was waiting in line to read the same book. So one had to be very fast in reading, not just reading, but making sure you understood the storyline even in your haste.

Now the only African Literature books I read then, were the ones recommended by the school for a certain subject, the ones bought for me by my Father, and the ones I took from my mother’s drawers then to read.

Books like Moremi, the courageous queen, Ajaka the white wizard, the ugly ones refuse to die, Efuru,Nwamba, A man of his people, the concubine, etc. Did I find these books interesting? Definitely. But was I interested in diving into African Literature? Not as much as I was in western books.

Maybe this was as a result of the fact that, so many of my school mates then, seemed to be more involved in stories that had to do with some duke or Lord and a lady, falling madly in love. After one of the parties or both have formed hard guy. Which is typical of teenage girls. We knew almost nothing on the authenticity of African Literature.

Or how it could shape how we see certain happenings in the society and build us up. We didn’t realise just how much of the history of who we are, was written on printed pages of a book. To me African Literature is deep, it tells stories a certain group of persons, don’t want us to know, it tells of real experiences people have faced. It’s Raw in all it’s beauty, from the book page down to the entire content.

If you’re a lover of African Literature, you must have probably some of the books I’ll be recommending. Although I hope you haven’t. But if you’re looking to start reading Nigerian books precisely, which are also under African literature, below are 7 books I believe will be a great startup.

1) Things fall apart by Chinua Achebe:

This book is the perfect start, because it’s not too lengthy, or too short. The story line is something our parents can relate to, and something that educates us on history. Especially that of the Igbos. The characters in this book have just the right amount of sauce. It tells of a story about a Warrior defeated in spirit, gives a certain level of exposure into Igbo culture. It’s something you wouldn’t want to put down, once you open it. This is a classical masterpiece by Chinua Achebe, that I highly recommend.

2)Stay with me by Ayobami Adebayo:

This book addresses real life issues, the importance of having knowledge of one’s genotype. It tells of pain felt by a mother who has lost a child, and just how damaging that could be mentally when it occurs more than once. The story shows just how much is too much, and how instrumental Children could be in in the healing process of a wounded parent. Stay with me is the reality of some marriages today in our society. Definitely a must read if you’re looking to start reading African Literature.

3)The secret lives of Baba Segi’s wives by Titilola Shoneyin:

Honestly I wouldn’t have thought about reading this book, until I entered a book club. When I was much younger, I heard the name repeatedly, but I always shook it off, didn’t seem appealing to my ears. But I must say that this book?!! Ah! This book wasn’t what I expected at all, it was a really good read. The issue of paternity today is expressed in between the pages. The stories of different women and their life situations are told. It shows that everyone has a story to tell. A reason why they are who they are, or why they make certain decisions, be it morally right or not.

4)Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi:

This book is lengthy I must confess, but your patience in completing it,would be totally worth it. Tomi Adeyemi’s mind is a well of creativity. This book is nothing like any other books you’ve read. I have nothing to gain from telling you lies, the author absolutely has no idea of my existence, so why lie? It’s intriguing, Cultural and also mystic. A Nigerian mystic book with Romance, historical background and tragedy? Ah ah!! How are you sleeping on this?! It’s a book everyone should read, honestly.

5)The thing around your neck by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie:

We all know Adichie doesn’t disappoint, ever. The Woman’s writing skills are out of this world. Personally I’ve never read any of her books,except this one which I purchased a month ago. But that’s about to change. This book is a collection of stories. Stories you and I can relate to with real life experiences. And certainly one of the books you should have in your shelf.

6)Freshwater by Akwaeke Emezi:

Okay I haven’t finished freshwater, I started the book and stopped somwhere along the lines of page 20. These days I find it hard to finish a book, it has nothing to do with the book’s content. Rather I’m just becoming too lazy to read, that’s all. But from what I’ve read, the book is about the popular term “Ogbanje”. Children gotten from the water. How these mami spirits operate in their lives and just how it affects them generally. What’s interesting is the author’s name, which means Egg of a python in Igbo land. I believe this story is coming from a very personal space, something based on actual experience. It’s educative and enlightening. Something we should all lay our hands on.

7)The Concubine by Elechi Amadi:

I actually read this book in secondary school, I can’t really remember the storyline. However I remember just how this book made me feel. I was intrigued, fascinated, knee deep into every line. The ending wasn’t exactly a happy one,if I remember correctly, but that book is a master piece. Elechi absolutely Amadi Killed it. He’s the only Male Author who I happen to have seen, God rest his soul.

So there you have it. 7 African Literature books by Nigerian Authors, we should all read. I honestly hope you try reading at least 2 or 3 of them, I’ll be waiting for your feedbacks!

Have a lovely week!

We have all felt lost at some point in our lives. As though our body, our personality is a stranger to us. It’s like living in a shell that isn’t yours. You don’t know it’s outlines, the weather conditions it can survive, the situations that could strengthen or weaken it’s authenticity. All you do is wear that shell and stay in there.

Perhaps you’re scared to explore certain parts of your shell because you’re scared of what you may find. Scared to discover you never really knew you. I know that fear, I understand it. But I also know that it’s better to know adaptation strategies, to prepare oneself for what’s to come. Rather than being unprepared for harsh weather conditions.

Finding oneself is a conscious decision. You have to want it badly for yourself. It’s not something that people do for you. It’s a very personal journey. Something I believe doesn’t end. You can never really say you’ve discovered yourself fully. Because as time goes on, you find out more about who you are, more about your pupose, the reason for your existence. Meaning, you may never see anything interesting about golf in your 20s, but one day you’re 60, and that’s all you want to play on weekends.

The mistake people make in self discovery is Impatience. You’ve probably watched so many videos on finding oneself, that you become convinced it’s something that can happen in days or a week. And then you discover that in a week,  well nothing has changed. Your shell still feels warm and homely.

You haven’t learnt anything New about who you are. That’s where the frustration sets in, why is it taking so much time? What’s actually happening? Why is this so hard? When these thoughts begin to accomodate your mind, your patience runs thin, and you end up making bad decisions and confusing those bad decisions for some hidden personalities or attributes you possess.

Now what’s the secret to finding oneself?

1)Patience:

You need to be patient with the process, with yourself. It’s not a competition against anyone, rather it’s a challenge to yourself to get to know you better. When you know this? Then you know the pace to work with. Don’t envy another person’s journey. Some people don’t need so many years to discover themselves to a reasonable extent. You might need a longer time, but that’s okay. The goal here is about you and not them. Besides different strokes for different folks. There is no certainty that what works for A will work for B. So please don’t be too hard on yourself.

What will Impatience will result in?

Mistakes and self misunderstanding.
This is when for instance you begin to do things that don’t flow with your soul, because you’re in a hurry to discover how they’ll feel. You punish your will and preservation, even at the expense of losing sight of who you are completely. Peer and social pressure, instead of free will takes a toll on your decision making, and you confuse that for your hidden traits. In totality, you’ll end up mistaking what you’re not for who you are or what you should be.

2)Commitment:

How committed are you to your personal growth? How much effort are you willing to put into your journey of self discovery? Because if you decide to embark on this journey, then you need to invest your time into it. It’s shouldn’t be an off and on relationship.  Be committed to yourself. The relationship you build with you, will help mold the relationships you build with other people. So once you begin? Don’t give room for excuses. Pause and take a breath if you must, but never stop. You’re going to fall along the way, that’s fine. We all fall down at some point. Losing your stepping isn’t the issue, staying put on the ground is.

3)Consistency and Honesty:

Be true to yourself. What do you want out of Life? Be consistent. Don’t start and stop at just any destination because, you’re not feeling it anymore. Keep pushing forward, let consistency be your watchword. Sometimes along the line we tend to forget, or neglect our personal journey due to situations that pop up.

I can understand that. The pressure of Life itself can be quite alot to deal with. But those are moments when you should even push harder, break limits and see for yourself ,just how Capable and strong you are. That way whatever happens, calm or storm, it becomes a medium for you to discover more about you. A disadvantage turned advantage. That’s how you keep the wheel spinning.

4)Leave your shell(comfort zone):

I’ll be honest with you. This is way harder than it seems. Because we were all brought up differently. So as much as I’m going to tell you to travel and get exposure, I’ll also tell you to be patient about it. Don’t be in a rush, but don’t be too comfortable either.

I know it’s hard to come out of the box you’ve grown so attached to. To try new things and discover just how many things you love doing but never knew, to actually breathe a different type of air. I know how difficult that can be. But I also know that difficult isn’t impossible.

When people hear travel they think that means outside their country. Travel can be the neighbouring state in your country, a place you’ve never been to, that’s what travel is. Leaving your comfort zone can be stepping out of your house, walking down to the next street and mingling with people there. It doesn’t have to be so far. You’ll be surprised at the things or places around you that you’ve never actually noticed were there.

Trying out new things could be waking up and having a different schedule planned out, it could be learning how to use a pencil to create images, taking a bask under the sun or simply reading a different genre of books.

So be Intentional about your journey. Want it.  Do right by it. Wind and Unwind when you must. Take risks but most importantly take time to breathe.

Have a lovely week!

I hope the topic of this article draws you to read, rather than chase you away. And if the former is the decision, then I’m glad you’re reading this.

I’m not going to go about boasting of the awesome relationship I have with God. That would be an unnecessary lie. One that does us no good. I’ve actually been struggling with letting God take absolute control.

Many at times we do it too, unconsciously. With this our mentality of I can do it on my own, it’s always I,I, and I.

Jesus said to cast our fears, our worries on him. He wants to be involved in our life. Every decision we take, whatever it is we’re going through, he wants to be involved. It’s okay if you don’t want to bother friends and family, but it’s not okay to keep him in the dark as well.

We may think we have it all figured out? But the truth is, we don’t. In as much as I can boast of the perfect relationship with God? I can boast of his Awesomeness. How it felt like when we were much closer.

“Pure Bliss”. That’s what it felt like, I felt this type of peace I can’t explain, a sense of fulfillment. Ofcourse I had my bad days, but when I had good days? Dear Lord, they were GOOD.

Truth is when you’re connected to God, things begin to unfold in miraculous ways. Your life begins to make more sense. When you constantly acknowledge his presence in your life, by involving him in your pain, your anxiety and depressions, you’ll see the manifestation of his Glory.

Put God at the Centre of it all. You don’t need to be strong alone. You don’t have to carry the burdens alone, allow yourself to be vulnerable to him. I know this isn’t like my other blog posts, but the only reason I keep pushing and writing is because I’m alive.

Not by my will but that of God. It’s because I have the courage, and wisdom to organize my thoughts into words. Not because I’ve earned that blessing, but because of his unending love for me.

I owe it all to God. So what type of child would I be, if I can’t spare an article for him alone who deserves all Glory and Praise? I really hope we do better in establishing our personal relationship with God. Because I’ve felt hia love and grace, I feel it everyday and it’s Amazing. Something worth experiencing for yourself.

Have a lovely week!