I really hope you do not find this offensive. Neither do you see this as me encouraging suicide. It’s a very scary thought, and definitely not something I would want anyone to ever think of. Because trust me I’ve been on that thin rope before. And I know just how suffocating it felt, to experience such emotions bursting through my veins.
If we’re are being truly honest with ourselves, one of the major reasons why some of us Christians or religious people, haven’t gone through with this act, is simply because we are scared of going to hell. Not even because we are thinking of the family we would be causing a huge amount of pain. Believe me, if taking one’s life wasn’t a sin, the world would be a grieving echo.
People are very quick to throw the stones of morality. Oh why would they do such an evil thing, oh that’s so selfish, why didn’t they talk to anyone? Infact people even hiss when the cause of death of a person is said to be suicide. Because to them,that’s stupid. An irrelevant death, an unwise decision. However these persons never sit down to ask themselves the big question “WHY”.
Didn’t that person have dreams they wanted to see to fruition? Goals and ambitions that drove them? Didn’t they have at least one person in the world who brought smiles to their gloomy faces. Where they not passionate about things as well? Did they not have places they would have loved to explore in the world? What could have triggered that person who seemed pretty Stable and happy, to take their own life. What signs did we miss?
So you can imagine the courage it took for any person who has ever done that, to actually go through with it. Yes they knew people were going to hurt, but they also felt like living would be hurting themselves even more. And it’s so sad that there are people who have reached their crossroads, people who are patiently waiting for any reason at all to keep going, and any last straw, that could break them eventually.
When you hear of a friend, who committed suicide, we suddenly jump out of the shadows throwing deceitful statements like “She could have spoken to me or someone about what she was facing, I met her several times, she always looked happy.
You know what I think? I think we say these things to comfort ourselves. To make us believe that we xould have stopped it, if she spoke to us. What we are forgetting here though is, when last did we do a checkup on this same person?
When was the last time we picked up our phones and said, Oh! I haven’t heard from this person in a while, I wonder how they’re doing, and then you give them a call, When? We are all guitly. We use the excuse of everyone has their shit to handle. If that’s as true as we preach it on our social media, Why then does it bother you when you lose a friend to suicide? What happened to dealing with your issues? Why are you suddenly showing concern you didn’t show when they were alive?
Why? Does it haunt you that much?
I get it, really I do. I understand that sometimes life can be really mean to us personally. I get that sometimes we even forget to check on ourselves. But what I will never understand, is how you stay comfortable with not hearing from someone who’s meant to be close to you, for a very long period. What I don’t understand is the regret you feel, because their dead.
Something you didn’t feel on the days you promised to give them a call and never did. Or the days they called and you sighed and never returned those calls. Because somehow your messed up mind thinks every call from an old friend has to do with them wanting money or a favour from you.
Suicide is as peaceful as it is selfish. There are so many people out there, some of them are in our tight circles who are suicidal. But we’re too busy with ourselves, to pay them any attention. Check on that friend who’s the life of every party, the sanguine whose tears or frowns you never see. The quiet and reserved ones, who would rather nod away than speak.
This world can be a very lonely place. You can have so may people around and still feel lonely. People are going through alot. They are fighting demons everyday and covering it up with the perfect smiles. That’s why when someone eventually decides that life is over for them.
They don’t think about anyone else more than the peace they believe they would get,if they leave this world. They think of a way to end the pain they feel deep down their souls forever. So yes, suicide is a selfish but peaceful decision.
Now I’m not encouraging anyone to take their lives. I would never do that. All I can say is, do a self evaluation of yourself. Are you really a good friend to those around you? Do you check on them? Even if it’s not reciprocated, just do it out of the goodness of your heart.
Be kind always to people, be kind. Again, I implore you, be kind. I’ll rather hold your hands and feel you hold them back. Than stand in front of you with different flowers, with the fragrance of what ifs and regrets.
Have a lovely day!
Inside their Minds 